Monsanto, Esso and Herbicides

So I was asked to go out to Whitecourt last week for work to go "Spraying". I was somewhat excited. It would be tough to be without Ali, but it would be near Jasper and we would be put up in a hotel.

Today we had our orientation and readied the spray truck. The orientation was with Esso/Imperial Oil. As images from a National Geographic expose on Esso in Chad were running through my mind, we were being told that Esso had a great concern for the environment and safety, and that we should too. I was then given the MSDSs (Material Safety Data Sheets) for the chemicals we would be using to kill plant life near Esso's more remote properties. Monsanto produces both of these: Roundup and some other product that starts with a 'B'. We spray these from a truck wearing full body suits and full face masks. We look like something out of the X-files.

And it feels like the X-files. It breaks my heart. Unfortunately, I am committed as I said I would go for a week or two. This is before I knew it was work for Esso using Monsanto products. I feel Nauseous. I feel awful. I feel violated. I feel like a character out of Oryx and Crake.

You see, I have been thinking about many things lately. I was talking with friend about philosophy and direction in life. He said that wherever we picture ourselves being "ideally" is where we should aim for. I feel like for a long time I have been hiding from myself in some ways. Part of me has always been ashamed of being Buddhist. Somehow the stigma of the contemplative life here has worn on me, and I wish not to talk about it. But my reaction to this type of work, to the useless killing of plant life ... to the indirect support of repression through corporation ... it brings my values into question ... I feel like my decision here is an important one. But how to live a pure life? It is so frustrating! Sometimes I wish I could hide from it all.

Sometimes, silence is very noisy.

Changes

Work, work. My Monday-Friday of late has been filled with landscaping. It's hard work, and my muscles are starting to feel tired. It's good in that, by the end of the summer, I should be in good shape. I've bought some protein powder so that I can have protein shakes to help me build some muscle mass. I've already made some improvement:
At work, I've also been driving bobcats, loaders (the big machines with shovels), dumptrucks and such, shoveling rocks and dirt, laying grass, planting trees, fixing cement curbs, and more to come, apparently. My boss is leaving the company soon too, and wants me to replace him, so it looks like I may be a crew chief within a month or two as well.

On a more personal front, things are also good. I met an old friend at the Edmonton airport during her layover between flights, and we talked about life. She is such a free spirit ... now moving to Iqaluit from Toronto to work as a journalist. I think the older I get and the more people I meet, the more I realize how much possibility and diversity there is. With each step into new territory, we change ourselves while also changing our environment. Nothing is stable, nothing is complete, and the more we see and do, the deeper we see into life. That star in our minds and in our eyes is fed, and we move forward, inwards. I love my friends ... all of them. It seems that we (the friends of my age) are also getting older ... moving into our own. Perhaps for the first time, taking responsibility for our lives and creating our own little worlds: having serious relationships and thinking of children, our future and our world. It is a weird, but happy, feeling.

Also, as an early birthday present, Ali bought me a keyboard!! Beauty! I can now play piano and compose! She is so wonderful ... she has such a beautiful mind and heart! I hope you can all meet her some day.

Web develop!

This page is great if you're interested in learning how to create web pages:

http://www.w3schools.com/

Finished my second week of landscaping ... and my muscles are tired! On Friday, we laid sod (grass) for 11 hours ... I will definitely be buff by the end of the summer!

Took my bike out for the first time yesterday ... it's so nice to be active again, and to not have to wear a winter jacket! There are trails along the river valley which I will have to check out soon.

I'm also starting to get into photography too ... what do you think?:

Spiderman 3 and german

I watched Spiderman 3 yesterday: THE WORST MOVIE EVER MADE!!! The first half was bearable, but the cheese factor approached infinity in the second half! It was awful! Spiderman in front of an american flag, a nice little, poorly done homage to godzilla, and lots of really bad acting and non-sensically shortened plotlines. If you want to see it, don't ...

I did however, have a great walk with Ali and had my first lesson in German! I learnt the alphabet and a few nouns like dog, tree, light ... I half forget them now, but I'm having fun!

Grades

I received the last of my grades today, and I'm pretty happy: A+ in Biology, A in Chemistry, A in Physics, A- in Genetics. This means I now have an overall GPA (Grand Point Average) of 3.96 and, for application to med school, my pre-requisite average is 4.0 (since Genetics is not a pre-requisite). Ahhh, it feels like a great load has been lifted from my shoulders.

The job is going well, although I've just learned that they don't pay overtime, which is odd. I'll have to call the government to see whether that is legal, and possibly find a new job, or ask for a raise to compensate.